Wednesday May 25, 2011

Hello Friends,

What an amazing day I've had. I went to see the Rehabilitation physician today and I have been cleared to return to work on a part-time basis as of June 6th. I am so excited to see my life starting to return to normal! After my doctor's appointment I then enjoyed lunch with some of my coworkers. I am humbled by all of the love and support offered during that short hour with friends.  

Slowly, but surely, the pieces are coming together. On Friday I have an appointment to be assessed for driver rehabilitation. I never knew how important the ability to drive could be, especially if you are not able to walk either. I mean if at 10 o'clock at night I decide I want a candy bar, I have to ask someone to go get it for me. Not being able to drive takes a huge piece of ones independence. This has been so difficult for me. Not only have had to accept help, I am forced to ask for it outright and then patiently wait for it!!! Definitely NOT things I am good at.

This is all about learning and growth I suppose. While I think this situation has allowed me use my strengths to their fullest extent, it has also forced me to confront my weaknesses. I am learning to be patient. I am learning to depend on people other than myself. I am learning to accept loss. I am learning to embrace change. I am learning humility. I am learning that I am not invincible. I am learning to appreciate my family and friends. I am learning to focus on right now instead of worrying about yesterday or trying to predict tomorrow. I am learning how to let go. I am learning to forgive imperfection in myself and those around me.

During all my time working in substance abuse treatment, I do not think I truly understood serenity until now. I cannot change this diagnosis and accepting that has given me incredible peace. Serenity allows me to mourn the life I have lost while at the same time, be hopeful about the unknown possibilities in a future I never planned or expected.

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things that I can and the wisdom to know the difference.

~ Reinhold Niebuhr

So please keep in mind that the message of this simple prayer is not just useful to those that have experienced addiction. It is a valuable lesson for all of us.

Thank you for listening. Talk to again soon!

(p.s. - Krissy the medication is called Rebif. If she has taken it before, I would be interested in her thoughts on it)